Black Agenda Report
Black Agenda Report
News, commentary and analysis from the black left.

  • Home
  • Africa
  • African America
  • Education
  • Environment
  • International
  • Media and Culture
  • Political Economy
  • Radio
  • US Politics
  • War and Empire

Waiters
Bill Quigley
02 Sep 2009
🖨️ Print Article
upsurge2
by Raymond Nat Turner
 
Ever attended a sumptuous repast where everything you wanted was out of reach, unavailable, "off the table".  To Raymond Nat Turner, poet-impresario of Oakland's UpSurge Jazz, this sounds suspiciously familiar.  Could it happen??

                   Waiters

                (For Caffie, Cindy and Cynthia)

Suppose… the state was a king-sized ATM and money-

Laundering machine for Wall Street Gangs—ludicrous

Criminal enterprise code-named Café Attitude, posing as

Five-star restaurant, where greasy-palmed waiters with Enron

Ethics and Haliburton hands, strut like star-spangled peacocks?

Suppose… armed to the teeth torturers strong-armed customers,

Premium prices for self-service, while customers’ wishes and

Suggestions were 86ed—outrageous restaurant of overbearing

Waiters, browbeating customers: “You’ve paid, now make us serve you!”

Impeachment, please

“Off the table!”

End of Iraq war, please

“Off the table!”

Afghanistan Kibosh?

“Off the table!”

 

Prosecuted Torturers, rare

“Off the table!”

A side of Single Payer, please

“Off the table!”

Employee Free Choice…

“Off the table!”

Amnesty For Undocumented…

“Off the table!”

Suppose… confused customers ask, “Well, what’s on the table?”

As sullen waiters, grab their crotches, and shout in unison:

“Order up!”

Stuffed Swiss Bank Accounts on Lobbyist Loaf;

Cayman Island TARP in Shadow Government Gravy;

“Order up!”

Sustainable-War Cash Cow with Supplemental Soup;

War Profiteer Pork with Cold Cash Garnish…

“Order up!”

Rotten Red Herring in Homeland Security Sauce;

Disaster Capitalist Crepes with Insurance Gangster Kebobs;

“Order up!”

Bi-Partisan Pork Stew with Arthur Anderson Cooked-Books;

Hot Air Poppycock prepared with Palm Grease…

“Order up!”

Layoff Lasagna with Fresh Foreclosure Salad;

Tighten Your Belt Tuna Melt Po’Boys ;

“Order up!”

Fluffy, Fox Mumbo-Jumbo with Race Card Rice;

Re-Heated Hope Succotash with A Shovel of Salt…

“Order up!”

Stolen Sweat Souffle with White Phosphorus Puree;

Crushed National Liberation Movement Coup-Coup—

Drizzled with Warm, Fresh Blood and Brine of Tears;

“Order up!”

Our Desserts are to die for…

Ton-Ton-Free, Thin –Crust Haitian Mud Pies…

“Order up!”

Af-Pak Pudding with Drone Strike Scones, light,

Flaky, Missile-Studded Scones served with a

Warm Creamy, Vanilla Collateral Damage Sauce;

“Order up!”

High Value Targets served on warm, moist beds of

Blood and guts, tender chunks of flesh in beguiling

Blood and Brain Batter, served on Pulverized Rubble—yum!

“Order up!”

Guantanamo Gelato served on Sheriff Joe’s Sweet Bread;

Waterboard Wedges served with Force Fed Fudge;

“Order up!”

Three Drug Cocktail Capitalist Punishment Punch;

Katrina Strange Fruit Flavored Sorbet; Brownie is extra…

“Order up!”

Suppose… customers, finally, dash for the door, and

Shove aside waiters demanding tips— and 30 pieces of silver?

 

Raymond Nat Turner © 2009 All Rights Reserved

Raymond Nat Turner is a Bay Area poet and impresario of UpSurge Jazz.  Visit them at http://upsurgejazz.com, and pick up one of their CDs.

Do you need and appreciate Black Agenda Report articles? Please click on the DONATE icon, and help us out, if you can.


More Stories


  • Aby L. Sène
    Patagonia Forest Fires Reveal Imperialist Theft of Protected Lands
    28 Jan 2026
    The arson attacks that engulfed the protected forests of he Andean-Patagonia region serve as a reminder that Western conservation models, which dispossess Indigenous peoples of their lands, are…
  • Anthony Karefa Rogers-Wright
    Trump Derangement Syndrome Is Real, And It Obfuscates the Requisite Question of Self-Determination in the Heart of U.S. Empire
    28 Jan 2026
    When political energy is channeled into opposing an individual, that energy is diverted from the work of building the popular power needed to challenge the empire he represents.
  • Hanna Eid
    Iran and the Strategy of Tension
    28 Jan 2026
    The Cold War-era "strategy of tension" has evolved into a modern system of hybrid warfare targeting sovereign nations that challenge Western hegemony.
  • Julia Wright
    The Photos of a Five Year Old ICE Terror Doesn't Want Us to See
    28 Jan 2026
    The arrest of a five-year-old captured public attention and ignited a prisoner revolt inside a U.S. ICE detention center. Powerful imagery is a useful tool for the people, but dangerous in the hands…
  • Al Jazeera Staff
    ‘If you sleep, settlers will burn your house’: fear in the West Bank
    28 Jan 2026
    The Palestinian village of Ras Ein al-Auja has held out against violent Israeli settlers – until now.
  • Load More
Subscribe
connect with us
about us
contact us